I can say that I wasn't really surprised to learn this, however, I was pleased. I've known these things about myself for my entire life, but was at a loss to explain them, and never bothered to assert what I really believed, knowing that I would be written off as crazy, delusional, or exhibitive of classical Freudian penis envy. I happen to have one of the longer finger ratio patterns, and to be honest, I've always felt that I was different from most other girls. Friends who really related to me on my wavelength were boys and tom-boyish girl types. As a former High school band member and GATE student (although not necessarily a straight A one, granted) and a several time poker tournament champion, now I know that my tendency to be direct, brusque, even crass at times, involved with intellectual pursuits, and a little bit of a science geek is not weird, but normal for who I am.
I've finally, at long last fully acknowledged to myself the fact that I've been fighting my nature for the duration of my existence in order to conform to mediocrity! Well, there will be no more of that! In order to self actualize, I must be in touch with my natural impulses: my aggression, my judgemental wit, and of course, my lust. I'm simply alpha... I can't help it. Women are subconsciously hateful of my calm self assured manner and directness, because they find it threatening to their self and other hating, backstabbing MO. I now have reconciled with my feelings of loneliness throughout my life... there simply aren't a lot of women like myself to connect with. *Embracing the Amazon...*
So it is, that I am not TRYING to be a dominatrix. I simply AM the dominatrix, by the very nature of who I am. The things that other women must script for themselves come to me as naturally to me as allowing a breath to enter my body. My spontaneity and creativity reigns supreme, my unbridled aggression, genuine through and through.