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11.30.2011

New disorders scheduled to be included in the DIagnostic Manual of Mental Disorders V


666.2 Repugnant malodorous unkempt liberal disorder.


This classification does not refer to liberal in general, but to a certain class of highly deluded, self righteous sort who are clouded with so much espoused rhetoric that they might be considered mildly schizophrenic. You know the ones--you see them in the street in their comfortable, un-stylish sneaks and pseudo-intellectual glasses, professing how they and their kind of the harbingers of love and understanding, while simultaneously, condescendingly attempting to psychoanalyze anyone who does not conform to their expectations of social norms. They do this, not out of altruism, but out of a misguided sense that their efforts are helping the world to "understand" others. Unfortunately, they only succeed in creating dysfunctional labels for others, obscuring the true reality from themselves, and perpetuating a form of insipid bigotry, in order that their own ideas about things conform with their world paradigm. They hold it in esteem to be militantly against any kind of organization, however perfunctory, and treasure the idea of egalitarianism, while branding those they deem threatening as Nazis, sociopaths, and dysfunctional personalities. Rhetoric and lies spread like wildfire in this community, because they are adamantly opposed to independent thinking. Shared community is key, and this also means partaking in "group-think." They have elevated their craft to such a level, that they have out performed the conservatives that they have villified.





666.3 Depraved Jackass disorder

This is a very specific classification used to describe run of the mill morons who like to mouth off for no apparent reason. They find it humorous to engage in all sorts of jack-assery, including defamation, loud and obnoxious behavior on the subways, celebration of sophomoric and perpetual juvenillism, including beer bonging, mutual ass sniffing and complementary nad scratching. They like to think that they are being incredibly humorous, although when presented with the highest forms of satire and dark comedy, they don't know what to make of it. They tend to be young, since their recalcitrant ways often lead them to suffer unfortunate tragedies, and they don't often see old age. The best course of action is to ignore them, in the same way that you would ignore the village idiot or madman, since any response that you make will likely be one that will debase you to their level. This type of person does not understand diplomacy, or backhanded remarks, and the only likely effective method of dealing with them would be to bitch-slap them upside the head.

766.6 Impacted fecalith disorder

This is usually suffered by members of the tea party, and the hard nosed of the "moral majority." They live in a closed society that does not acknowledge biological drives of any kind, including urination, defecation, sexual urges, and sometimes even hunger. They have managed to take all the power for themselves, since they don't spend any time masturbating, fucking, or enjoying R rated films, they have proceeded to take to the polls and represent a minority's views as representative of the majority. Thankfully, they mostly inhabit the suburbs and do not have a significant presence in large, urbanized areas, where they are not able to park their gas guzzling SUVs and lounge in sprawling backyards.

666.66  Non-specific Dysfunctional Syndrome

This diagnosis may be used for people who are generally productive and functional, but may be classified as "difficult," a little bit "strange" or just generally un-likable.  They are usually non-conformists who take pleasure in causing others discomfort by flouting their disregard for socially accepted norms.  They may be described as bossy, passive, loud-mouthed, exceptionally reserved, poor dressers, ostentatious, or wall flowers.  These are people who aren't quite pathological enough to fit any of the usual diagnoses, but people who strike you as somehow "off."  As a matter of fact, their insipid pathology may be even more dangerous than those who are fully dysfunctional.  This label may be applied liberally to public figures, politicians, and co-workers who you hate.

Please note that aside from the last diagnosis, that all patients must fit very specific diagnostic criteria in order for the diagnosis to be given.  These new diagnoses will improve the ease with which entertainment writers and gossip columnists make un-professional diagnoses that will be accepted by housewives across the country as scientific fact.

NIgerian Sex Slavery

The National Agency for the Prevention of Traffic in Persons recently conducted a botched attmept to evacuate 93 "victims" of human trafficking, including a few babies.  The underage women and children were reportedly used as slaves, including sexual slaves.  When does the insanity stop?

Where does an upstanding pervert go nowadays to find good, healthy, able bodies slaves and flesh to be used?  It's bad enough that there are no longer any decent live sex shows, XXX theatres, and tranny bars left in any major metroplitain areas in the country.  Now, they're trying to ruin it for sex tourists as well!  I mean let's face it, what's worse, a little nookie for pay, or a life condemned to famine, oppression, and starvation?  And who's to say that the girls felt victimized anyway?  Did anyone ask them?  If you ask me, who doesn't like to be shtuped good and hard now and again?  And of course, getting paid for it just makes it all that much sweeter.  Not only that, Nigerian women are gaining the privilege to work in brothels in such desirable countries as Ireland, and even Italy! This is a right that some others might pay thousands for, and they get to go for free!  I really feel for those affected by this sad state of affairs.  I mean, after all, not everyone has willing sex slaves throwing themselves at their feet, the way that I do. 

We need to act now, before agencies like NAPTIP ruin sexual tourism for good.  Make it known to your congress-person now, that you support underprivileged countries rights to coerce, exploit, and use people the same way that our American Corporations do, without the stigma attached with crimes against humanity.  It's simply the natural law of power dynamics, and tampering with it is simply nothing more than Marxism at it's best (or worst.)  It's all in the name of capitalism, and good old fashioned competition.


11.20.2011

More on Gender Identity - Really awesome gender test

I've been geeking out again and taking more gender tests online.  I can say that all of the tests have confirmed my previous self views about myself, mainly, that I embody the best of the masculine and the best of the feminine in one body.  I'm basically superhuman.  How is this possible?  It must be special blessings from universal energy.  I should be cloning myself and bestowing the world with lots of progeny, in order to better the human race.  In any case... 

The test is especially well constructed, easy to take, and I can say that not only did I have fun taking it, I really feel that I learned a good bit about myself that I didn't know before in the process.  I've realized that I'm more "masculine" than a large percentage of men, yet more feminine than many women at the same time.  I have the mind of an engineer, yet possess the empathic powers of a saint (which of course, I have utilized to the best end possible, to control and manipulate people for their own personal enjoyment and pleasure.)  People don't know what to make of me... they can't put me in a "box."  As it is, I do not have difficulties relating to other people.  Other people have difficulties relating to me.


**Please note that since this is a British publication, any misspellings are entirely the fault of the BBC. My own comments have been demarcated by a double asterisk.

Take the test here:  http://www.bbc.co.uk/science/humanbody/sex/add_user.shtml

Results
The scale below is an indication of where you fall in the male-female brain continuum. The results are based on the angles, spot the difference, 3D shapes and words tasks.  Bear in mind that your performance may be affected by many factors in addition to gender, like age and intelligence.


Your personal brain scores on three gender scales:
100----50---0---50----100 (50 male)
100----50---0---50----100 (50 male)
100----50---0---50----100 (50 female)


Part 1 -Angles


This task tested your ability to identify the angle of a line by matching it with its twin. This is a spatial task, which looks at how you picture space.

Your score: 18 out of 20 (Average score for men: 15.1 out of 20, Average score for women: 13.3 out of 20)
  • If you scored 0 - 12: You have more of a female brain. Scientists believe that people with a female brain find it more difficult to judge the slope of a line because they're not wired for spatial tasks. In past studies, 65 per cent of people who scored in this range were women.
  • If you scored 13 - 17: You found this test neither hard nor easy. This suggests your brain has male and female traits when it comes to spatial ability.
  • If you scored 18 - 20: You have more of a male brain. On average, men outperform women in this task and those with more mathematical knowledge tend to score quite high as well. In past studies, 60 per cent of the people in this range were men.
Interestingly, men's testosterone levels fluctuate through the seasons and studies have shown that men's scores are lower in the spring, when their testosterone levels are at their lowest.


Spot the difference


This task tested your ability to identify which objects changed position. You lost points, if you incorrectly identified objects.
Your score: 57%     (Average score for men: 39%,  Average score for women: 46%)
  • If you scored between 0 - 33%: You may have more of a male brain. Scientists say men tend to under perform in this task. The corpus callosum, the part of the brain that links the right and left hemispheres, is a fifth larger in women. This means women can process visual and other signals at the same time more easily than men. There is also a theory that oestrogen levels in women give them an added advantage in spatial memory.
  • If you scored between 34 - 66%: You may have a balanced female-male brain.
  • If you scored between 67 - 100%: Those with a female-type brain generally score in this range. Your ability to remember where objects are may serve as an advantage to you when you're trying to find your way around places. You're more capable of recalling landmarks to get from one place to another.
Part 2 Hands


You said your left thumb was on top when you clasped your hands together.
  • Right thumb on top: This suggests the left half of your brain is dominant. Many studies have tried to establish whether there is a relationship between handedness and brain dominance. Some scientists believe that if you are left brain dominant, you would be more verbal and analytical.
  • Left thumb on top: This suggests the right half of your brain is dominant. Some studies theorise that as a right brain dominant person, you may excel in visual, spatial and intuitive processes.
However, these theories are debatable and leave much to be said about the small percentage of people who are ambidextrous.  Find out why right-brained people may be better fighters and artists.


Part 3 -Emotions and Systems

This task looked at whether you prefer to empathise or systemise.

Empathising:
Your empathy score is: 13 out of 20 (Average score for men: 7.9 out of 20, Average score for women: 10.6 out of 20)


Empathisers are better at accurately judging other people's emotions and responding appropriately. If you scored 15 and above, you are very empathic and would be an ideal person to comfort people in a time of crisis. Women in general are better at empathising.


Systemising:
Your systemising score is: 15 out of 20 (Average score for men: 12.5 out of 20, Average score for women: 8.0 out of 20)


Systemisers prefer to investigate how systems work. A system can be a road map, flat pack furniture, or a mathematical equation – anything that follows a set of rules. A score of 15 and above suggests you're good at analysing or building systems. Men in general are better at systemising.


Eyes:


This task tested your ability to judge people's emotions.
Your score: 8 out of 10
Average score for men: 6.6 out of 10
Average score for women: 6.6 out of 10
**women scored 6 out of 10? Sheesh! This explains everything!
  • If you scored 0 - 3: Do you think you're good at judging how another person is feeling? Your score suggests this doesn't come to you quite so naturally.
  • If you scored 4 - 6: Your result suggests you have a balanced female-male brain and find it neither easy nor difficult to judge people's emotions.
  • If you scored 7 - 10: Your result suggests you are a good empathiser, sensitive to other people's emotions. Women generally fall into this category.
Professor Baron-Cohen at the University of Cambridge says that people usually perform better than they expect to on this test.  Men often think a person's eyes are sending signals of desire when that's not the case at all. Find out more.


Part 4 -Fingers

We asked you to measure your ring and index fingers. Your ratios came to:
Right Hand: 0.94
Left Hand: 1.08  **comment: I was watching a movie while doing this test, and put the right measurement into the wrong slot.  Both of my hands have a finger ratio of about .94

Average ratio for men: 0.982    Average ratio for women: 0.991


It's thought that your ratio is governed by the amount of testosterone you were exposed to in your mother's womb. The ratio of the length of your index finger to the length of your ring finger is set for life by as early as three months after conception. Even during puberty, when we experience intensive hormonal changes, the ratio stays the same.  Men generally have a ring finger that is longer than their index finger, which gives them a lower ratio than women, whose ring and index fingers are usually of equal length.  Studies have found that men and women with lots of brothers generally have more masculine finger ratios. 

Part 5 -Faces

This task looked at how you rate the attractiveness of a series of faces. The images you looked at were digitally altered to create slight differences in masculinity.  Your choices suggest you prefer more masculine faces.  Highly masculinised male faces possess more extreme testosterone markers such as a long, broad and lower jaw, as well as more pronounced brow ridges and cheekbones.  (A typical 'attractive' female face possesses features such as a shorter, narrower, lower jaw, fuller lips and larger eyes than an average face.)  Interestingly, women's preferences are said to vary across the menstrual phase. A more masculine face is preferred during the 9 days prior to ovulation, when conception is most likely.
**the test wouldn't allow me to rate women's faces also.  Now, if I want to do that I'll have to do the whole damn thing over again.  I think attraction in real life has to do with so many other characteristics than facial structure, including intelligence, shared interests and culture, and even dress.  (Okay, I'm a little bit shallow in that sense). I seem to like more masculine faces on the test, but in reality, the love of my life was androgynous.


credit: Taken at L.A. Bondage Ball 2003


Part 6 -3D shapes
This task tested your ability to mentally rotate 3D shapes.


Your score: 9 out of 12 (Average score for men: 8.2 out of 12 , Average score for women: 7.1 out of 12)
  • If you scored 0 - 6: Do you find yourself having to physically rotate a map to point in the direction in which you're travelling? This might explain why you scored in the lower range in the 3D shapes test. Twice as many women as men score in this category. Previous studies suggest that those with a female-type brain or with an arts background fall into this range.
  • If you scored 7 - 9: In past studies, 50 per cent of the people who scored in this range were women and 50 per cent were men.
  • If you scored 10 - 12: Are you an engineer or do you have a science background? People with these skills tend to score in this range. Past studies have concluded that people in this range have a more male brain.
Nearly a third of men who took this test got full marks, whereas less than 10 per cent of women managed the same.


Verbal Fluency


Your score: you associated 0 word(s) with grey and you named 6 word(s) that mean happy. We are assuming that all the words you entered are correct.
Average score for men: 11.4 words total
Average score for women: 12.4 words total
**I actually associated six words with grey, but for whatever reason, things like suit, pigeon, and cloud didn't count.  What the fuck is typically grey anyway? I also didn't use up all the time, because I wasn't sure how many items were on the test, and how the time would be allocated.  Whatever.  I know I'm brilliant.
  • If you produced 1 - 5 words: You are more of the strong, silent type with a male brain. You probably find it easier to express yourself in non-verbal ways, preferring action rather than words.
  • If you produced 6 - 10 words: Most people in this range have a female-type brain.
Women are said to use both sides of the brain when doing verbal tasks while men mainly use their left side. Studies have shown that girls develop vocabulary faster than boys. This difference in brain power is caused by levels of pre-natal testosterone.


Ultimatum
This task asked you how you would divide money.


If you had to split £50 with someone, you said you would demand £30.  So far on the Sex ID test, men have demanded 51.6% (£25.80) of the pot and women have demanded 51.0% (£25.50), on average.
  • Sex differences are small in this task. Demanding less than 60% of the pot (ie £30) is more typically female. Demanding more than 65% of the pot (ie £32.50) is more typically male.  Scientists believe that people with lower testosterone levels tend to take fewer risks so they are probably more willing to keep less for themselves. Those with higher testosterone levels tend to drive a harder bargain and are less compromising.
Men's testosterone levels fluctuate over the seasons and are at their lowest levels during the springtime. This is said to influence their bargaining power. Find out more about the role of testosterone.



11.16.2011

A toast

Cheers! Here's to the 99%!

You unknowingly allowed the 1% to use you, manipulate you, and fuck you in the ass while you hovered over them like flies on crap, catered to their every whim, and thanked them for every puff of air that they bestowed on you. You touted your grandness by association while times were good, and developed an inflated sense of self worth, as meanwhile, the 1% continued to laugh behind your back, delighted at the ease with which they fleeced you. Because you do not vote, read the paper, or keep tabs on what's been happening in your community, you have allowed the 1% to buy up public land to build condos, shopping centers, and Walmarts, and take every word emitted from the almighty television (and representatives thereof) as words of god. You reveled in the new community, a vacuous facade of shopping malls, mass produced ready to wear clothing, and frankenfood, which has estranged you from any culture but that created by the elites for the masses. Your lust for luxury, combined with your reduced capacity for independent reasoning, has allowed you to get stuck in the fragrant, gooey cesspool that you are in. You ingratiated yourself to the 1% and bought into the lie, only to cry like babies now that the fantasy has become the reality. You may now reap your just deserts!




11.10.2011

Sacred Sex Roundup, NYC

I was very honored to have been a guest at the Sacred Sex Roundup, an annual event held at Reflections Yoga studio in midtown Manhattan.  http://sacredsexroundup.com  The orgasmic state of breath, the enlightenment of sexual being, and the delights of conscious BDSM, are taught and experienced in the most dynamic, thought provoking, and inspiring ways, by conscious and lifestyle practitioners throughout the weekend. It was wonderful to engage and connect with the poly, tantric, health conscious, and kinky communities in this convergence of sex positive energy.

I took part in a panel with hosts Swami Umeshanand Saraswati, Devi Veenanand, Rev. Jenellen Fischer, and Lee Harrington, during which we took questions regarding different aspects of the practice of BDSM and it relates to tantra and spirituality in general. Video of the session will be available soon on the Sacred Sex website in a pay per view format, along with many other provocative and informative discussions and demonstrations. Check it out!

11.05.2011

What is Normal?

In our society, there is a huge emphasis on maintaining "normalcy" as it was so gracefully put by Warren Harding back in the 1920s.  Everyone wants to be "normal," and there is definitely a shame and a stigma attached to being "abnormal."   In fact, members of the psychological community are rapidly working to define "normal" behavior, in order that we might effectively treat abnormal, freakish behavior, and contain it so that it does not disrupt the normal flow of day to day existence for normal people.  So I had to ask myself, what is "normal," exactly?  Rather than fabricate some arbitrary information, I decided to define normal in the empirical sense, based on facts and statistical evidence.  Here are just a few tidbits of juicy information that I have uncovered regarding the state of "normal."

The average, normal person is about 35 years old, lives in a family group of about 3 people, has not graduated from college, and makes 32,000 dollars per year.  Coincidentally, only the abnormal freaks, who constitute about 15% of the American population, have graduated from college.

According to the U.S. National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey of 1994, about half of American men and women have BMIs over 25 (overweight), and about one quarter have a BMI of 30 or more (seriously obese.) The average BMI for American men and women now exceeds 27 (seriously overweight.)  I don't have any stats on this, but I'd be willing to bet large sums of money that the average American spends more time eating than they do exercising (and by exercise, I don't mean walking from your desk to the coffee machine, even if you do that multiple times per day.  I mean, a time allocation during which you put on your running shoes and pound the pavement, engage in sports, or hit the gym.)  The average person, however, seems to have plenty of time to watch TV.  According to data collated by The Nielsen Company, the average American watches 151 hours of TV per month (that amounts to 5 hours per day.)

Although most people consider themselves to be highly social and popular, studies performed by the American Sociological Review (June, 2006) have found that, believe it or not, the average American has 2 friends (dropped from 4 in 1985) and as many as 25% have no close confidants at all.  For the purposes of the study, a "friend" is defined as someone that you feel comfortable confiding sensitive and personal information with, rather than an associate, who you might know from work or school, but might only share lunch with casually, and have a very superficial relationship with.  About 80% of those surveyed admitted to feeling uncomfortable sharing personal information of an intimate nature with anyone other than family.   And of course, many of these people are, in my exceedingly humble opinion, those that are seriously challenged when it comes to traits involving human civility, courteousness, and diplomacy.

The results of the National Adult Literacy Survey conducted in 1992 have shown that the average American does not possess the literacy skills to recall a few simple facts they have just read in a short written piece, nor are they able to make basic inferences based upon the material they have read.  About half of all Americans have trouble with basic reading comprehension, and the majority of these are white and native born.  American parents are able to read at a 7th to 8th grade reading level, although the vast majority of materials distributed by pediatricians to parents, written specifically for the lay person, are written at a 10th grade reading level.  Almost half of patients, about 41%,  could not understand directions for taking medication on an empty stomach, and a bit more than 50% could not understand a standard consent form, according to a study conducted by Emory University in conjunction with UCLA.

According to results from the 2009 National Assessment of Educational Progress,  if you are a normal student,  you might have trouble answering questions related to basic algebra, such as the following:
"Which of the following expressions is NOT equivalent to (a + b) (x + y) ?"  Notice that the question does not involve SOLVING the equation, which might, of course, involve errors in computation,  but rather, it merely asks that the student be able to recognize and match terms which are equal to the original, and which would act as a good indicator of a lack of understanding for basic concepts in algebra.

I'm sure that all these factors, as well as others that are not quite so easily quantifiable, have contributed to the sad fact that the average doctoral candidate for engineering programs in the USA is now a citizen from another country (usually India, China, the Philippines, South Korea and Taiwan,) from cultures that embrace pain and tribulation as inherent to existence, rather than trying to avoid them at all costs, and where they are not so consumed with what is "average" and "normal," but instead with what is adaptive, productive, and excellent.


So in conclusion, let's hear it for all of you fabulous normals out there!  If it weren't for you guys, the country would be an entirely different place!

References

Biddle, Rishawn. (1/23/11) Bad Math. [American Spectator] Retrieved on November 4, 2011 from
http://spectator.org/archives/2011/01/26/bad-math

Kornblum, Janet. (6/22/2006) Study: 25% of Americans have no one to confide in [USA Today] Retrieved from  http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/2006-06-22-friendship_x.htm

Lee, Chelsea. (October 6,2011). How to Cite Something You Found on a Website in APA style [APA Blog]. Retrieved November 4,2011 from http://blog.apastyle.org/apastyle/electronic-references/

Semuels, Alana (February 24, 2009) Television Viewing at All Time High [LA Times] Retrieved November 4, 2011, from  http://articles.latimes.com/2009/feb/24/business/fi-tvwatching24

The Average BMI in the USA  (May 1, 2011) [Livestrong Blog] Retrived November 4, 2011 from
http://www.livestrong.com/article/154837-the-average-bmi-in-the-usa/

The Informatics Review:Why is Reading Comprehension So Important? (September 1, 2008) Retrieved on November 4, 2011, from
http://www.informatics-review.com/FAQ/reading.html
http://www.informatics-review.com/FAQ/comprehension.html

US census bureau fact sheet (year 2000) [government database] Retrieved November 4, 2011 from http://factfinder.census.gov/servlet/SAFFFacts

Various Articles from Wikipedia, Retrieved November 4, 2011 from
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Average_Joe
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Friendship
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body_mass_index