My entire life I've been, you know, a total loser. I knew early on that I had talents in the verbal skills department, winning the spelling bee in elementary school, levying interest for a student published newspaper in 5th grade, and going on to win the science fair for a psychology related topic in 7th grade, but instead, I decide to let myself become engrossed with the dark and seedy world of kink and porn.
Adult life wasn't much easier for me, as I went on to become a super nasty film queen, published model, professional party-er, and wanna be trash from Hollywood, and coincidentally putting myself through grad school on the side (as insurance of course, just in case my career in kink didn't take off)
And now I'm sitting on this utterly useless medical degree, when I could be contributing to society by working at the copy center, or being an administrative assistant in a cubicle somewhere.
Absolutely, unfathomably, terrible.